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What is church?

"Wait, you go to church?" Interesting to take note of the comments people make when they learn that I go to church. I still almost don't believe myself when I say I go to church. Never thought I'd step foot back in one let alone openly share that I go. I wouldn't want someone thinking I'm a judgmental, double-standard hypocrite! 

What made me return to church?
THE PEOPLE! Meeting awesome people in my every day life who happened to be part of a church. I suppose if they were part of a bowling league this post would be talking about how I now bowl... 

They didn't have Christian jargon coming out of their mouth every other sentence. If that were the case my church PTSD would have shut the door immediately. 

Their Instagram feeds showed real life rather than it being full of long prayers, scriptures and shots of their bible next to their coffee. They openly drank, said a curse word every now and then, made perverted jokes for fun... I mean they were normal!? 

This all sparked my curiosity because it debunked anything I was ever conditioned to expect and so the door I slammed on the church's face four year's ago began to open...

How did I return to church?
This was the hardest part. I kept showing up Sunday after Sunday unsure why. I would confront the pit in my stomach every time I stepped through the door. I slowly gathered I was also being stubborn to prove a point to myself that I could face my fears and judgements of the modern day church. 

I eventually took responsibility for all the fears and judgements I had towards the church. I relinquished the self-pity and victim mentality and was able to see my upbringing wasn't bad or wrong -- I just happened to interpret it in a way that wasn't very empowering to me. Sure I could sit here all day and talk crap about the things people did or said and how it all made me feel, but at the end of the day I choose freedom.

Why do I go to church? 
I let humanly flawed people create this concept of God my whole life, one that I couldn't relate to. I was never able to truly see, know and experience God on my own. Now that I do have that, it comes with a whole new appreciation. I'm actually enjoying learning about God through this new lens.

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So really... what is church?

Comments

  1. UnknownSeptember 22, 2017 at 10:23 PM

    I like reading what you write. This is such an interesting topic among people our age. That you for being bold enough to share this. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownSeptember 23, 2017 at 12:45 PM

      Thank you, Shon! I'm glad you said something. :)

      Delete

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